Whatever is going to happen in next few days, weeks, months, hopefully years and decades… I just want to remember one thing: 

“a successful relationship is one that is ok with all the imperfections. it isn’t whether you have messy times…you always will. it is how you handle things together”

So simple, understandable…yet  somehow and sometimes difficult to achieve.

I was told a long time ago to keep my mind focused on one idea: “stress is living too much in the future or in the past. In the present, you are capable of any situation that arises.”

Why do I feel that I am really getting stressed at this very point cuz I can’t handle the present situations? 

I am only trying to stay strong, because I know this is just the beginning. It’s gonna be worse. I am very glad that I had such tough experiences in Bristol, especially with managing, cuz this is gonna be pretty much the same. Not to mention the work around Prom. 

Anyway, wish me luck. I have a long night ahead of me. I promised myself that if I give in to the desire to go to sleep before everything is done, I won’t go to Bristol in 10 days. Kinda good motivation to stay up and finish everything. 

Anyway, just to cheer me up:

“dreams can come true with bravery and a ridiculous amount of work”

“that’s just how life is…you think, oh my god, this is it…I’m in trouble. and nothing happens”

“it won’t stop. You will have challenges…but success in life is how well you respond to the hard things! You have to see opportunity in everything. Losing a job, a friend…whatever. You have to somehow think about what you can gain from it”

“I’m proud of you”

“the thing is…there’s nothing for you to feel regret about….everything that happened in your past has made you the indescribably beautiful creature you are! I mean I would like for some things to be better for you…but I selfishly wouldn’t want to change it…cuz that would change you! :) in the long-run, you’re better off the way you are. you have the right attitude for a very successful life. you will always be ok because you will depend only on yourself…some people wouldn’t be as strong in your position but you are… even people with rich dads or whatever…they have it great sometimes but then things can change…dad dies or whatever. but you’ll always be ok”

“You should believe in yourself for no other reason than for who you are.”

“yes but you have had fewer influences to corrupt you. Those will come and you will have to fight them. The real trick is to learn to do what you have to do in a practical sense without losing that voice of truth within you. I think you already do that…but life is long and this can be difficult.”

“I believe in you. I worship you and believe in you and….”

“Lenka you have to find a way not to waste your potential in life. You are so brilliant. You can’t waste your life waiting on ignorant people in restaurants. There’s nothing wrong with that but for you I think it is wrong. I hate this system for making you do that. For not seeing your potential. So many stupid fucking people get so many opportunities. I don’t want to make you hate where you are right now, but it is wrong.”

“the thing is…everything you need to be the best person you can be is already inside of you. as long as you don’t listen to harmful influences and listen to your heart.”

“I don’t doubt you for a second.” 

“…..but a spark that is untamed can burn the whole fucking world and, not to be overly dramatic, but if I had to bet on one person to have her impact on the world, I’d bet on you. That’s no pressure…just seems that way from where I’m sitting.. Your unique voice is starting to shine through” 

“I just wanted to say that you are fucking brilliant”

 

This fucking helped. I didn’t even think so at first place. All that and more. I am not sure whether I deserved that but I’ll keep all that in my mind forever. It is something that I will always appreciate above all. Thank you. 

You’re not a song I would ever forget
you’re the piece of art that makes me wet
you’re the untold story of two fragile lips
you melt into my unwritten scripts.

You’re not the song that I would ever regret
you’re the question-mark balloon that I won’t let
your body moves to me closer each day
with each naughty thought I love to play

You’re the song I will always remember
when I die old and weak in the bleak september
I will feel your young body teaching me to moan and shake
I will feel how it used to be, the beautiful next morning ache

You are the song I’ll always keep singing
I know I don’t have to be clinging
But you’re the song that comes back
with each live concert and few tracks

~ written on 2nd April 2008… I need you in my song.